The Bachelorette: Week 7

So I tried to stay on top of this, but obviously THAT didn't work. I swear to you, every Monday night I stay at Dennis', I always either forget to watch it or no one else wants to watch it with me; thus leaving me with the only option of locking myself in his room by myself. No, thanks. But this week, I said to myself, "Self, I'm going to watch the Bachelorette tonight, because I like it and it's silly and I want to." So there you have it.

Let's start off with this:

+ Chris, you're freaking me out, man. I'm not feelin' the whole psychotic vibes you're givin' off. In fact, I think you should probably seek some professional help because you're seriously obsessed with this girl you hardly know. And you took her aside at the rose ceremony?! My boyfriend kept saying, "Oh EM GEE. I can't believe he did that." (Dennis was driving me a little nuts.) I mean, that was a little psycho. His eyes were twitching and his head was nodding at a seriously fast pace. Scary. Watch out, guys. When he's not picked in the end, he might go postal.

+ Emily, your teeth. They freak me out. I don't think you're that pretty and you're teeth... they're just downright frightening. Do you use those things to eat lots of raw vegetables? Because if I had those, I totally would. Mmhmmmm.

+ Is it just me or is Arie's face really blotchy? When he shaves, he looks really weird!! And guys, c'mon. He didn't tell Emily that he dated the producer-chick, because the producer-chick and her clan of producers asked him not to so that there would be drama. Durrrrrr. But nonetheless, Arie and Emily definitely have the most chemistry in my opinion. I'm calling him and Chris as the final two.

+ Doug, you were cute, but I missed the group date because I got bored. Two hours is too much...

+ Jef, missed your date too. Sorry, dude. But I think she actually likes you. But can we please do something with your hair? It's too much. I liked it in the beginning, but now it's a negative. Cut it. Just into a shorter version. I like the style, but you're working too hard.

+ John was boring. I yawned. And Emily was bored too. He was a goner at the beginning of the episode. No matter how psycho Chris was, John was going. Arie was already ahead of him. He's in love with her and John, you're just starting to see it as a possibly happening someday. No dice, bro. Not keepin' up. Saying "I can totally see myself falling in love with you" is not nearly as awesome as "I'm in love with you. Now."

+ Sean, what was up with the chase-down. You're weird. I mean, it was cute, but I was confused. You don't know where she's staying? And I can't imagine that you really ran around all of Prague and then found her in a dark alley... Silly reality t.v. But good make-out sesh. Kudos to that. I mean, I enjoyed it. (Not as good as the week prior though, with Arie the blotch-face man.)

The End