Thursday, June 28, 2012

Aggressive Blog Commenting

Lately I've noticed A LOT of both straight-up aggressive blog-commenting and passive-aggressive as well. And I do not blame these lady-bloggers who are receiving these comments for publicizing them or blogging about them AT ALL. I mean people can be effing mean!

The point of my post specifically though is to share my thoughts on commenting on blogs. I think it is easy, especially for the genre of blogs that I enjoy the most, for readers to only give positive feedback, such as:

"Oh EM GEE! I love love love that purse!! You look amazing!!!!!"

"Ummm wow, you're perfect. Want to be you."

"I love your outfitttuuhhh."

"I'm in love with your outfiiitttuhhh."

"You're amazing!! I LOVE YOU!!!"

And yes, trust me, getting those comments is so nice. I love getting those comments A LOT. And yes, I write those comments on a daily basis! It's affirmation! Good stuff, right?! AND it's pretty much just like - instant smile effect, ya know? But I think it is really important for us to all give each other feedback that isn't necessarily "positive" all the time. Will you, I'm not going around writing hate-notes on other people's blogs. I would never in a million years say something that I thought could potentially be hurtful. But when bloggers are writing about controversial subjects, such as fat-acceptance or politics or religion, they are going to get comments that are different from their own views and may possibly take offense.

Blogging is a beautiful thing. It teaches us how to express ourselves through writing, but not just that. We learn how to express ourselves accurately. Accuracy is huge in blogging. The other day, a lovely blogger that I follow had an outfit post and her boobs were pretty out there, ya know? She got a lot of crap for it and got a little upset, because that's not how she wanted to portray herself! It sucked, because she's an awesome woman and a great blogger with lots of energy and got shit for it. I just read another post from another blogger who got a hate-email. Really, guys? Really? If you don't have anything nice/healthy feedback, then just don't waste your time. You're obviously less secure with yourself than the blogger that you're trying to hurt.

That's my little rant.

Thanks. The End.

P.S. Don't forget to enter the Sango Blowfish Shoe Giveaway - last day to enter is Tuesday, July 3 at midnight


JanM ♥ said...

I agree with you. I think we should just all be honest about what we're going to say but of course, we need to be nice too :)

I'm having a $20 Gift Card Giveaway on my blog, check it out if you're interested. :)

Nomali/Minenhle said...

This is so true. I've seen a few mean-spirited people in these blogger streets and I do y best to stay away from such. It's sad really. I'd be taken aback if somebody came on my shabby blog and called it ugly, but if someone who read my many rants and tweets of being headerless came on and shared a designer or software that does greta headers then yayers.

Love from Jo'burg

PS: I like this nook

jen said...

Ok, now that I've stalked you over on your giveaway post..muahahaa.

I love positive feedback on blog posts.. affirmation is such a good thing. But I can't grow as a blogger or person without hearing other people's points of view.

That being said I think the hate mail bit is taking it too far - that's just unhelpful asshattery!

As for portraying ourselves accurately, you never know how someone else will view what you've said, even if you think you're being clear as a bell. There are always nutters out there who will purposely misinterpret just to stir the pot.

I think as a blogger you've just got to do the best you can and be careful not to feed the trolls.

Lisa {A Piece of Lisa} said...

I agree, there're should be a happy medium between "everything is AMAZING!!!!" and stupid mean comments. I would never write anything mean but if the blogger writes about something controversial they should totally expect some feedback/criticism. One time some weirdo had a total rant in my comments about me posing for photos, she was SO angry and accused my whole life of being fake, so bizarre ha ha!

Michaela Scalisi said...

nice blog :)

Kendra said...

Hi Karina!
I found you through a comment you left on one of the blogs you referenced in this post. I completely agree with everything you said, and this is a great, well-written post, love it. We need more of it around.

I am also a commenter that the blogger didn't like what I had to say. I never intended to hurt her feelings, but was just being honest. In fact I adore "H's" blog, and felt that that one post portrayed her in a way that was so far removed from the image she usually paints. My comments to her came from a place where I imagined my best girlfriend being completely depressed about not being able to run. My job as her bestie is to remind her of all the wonderful things she still can do, and that just because she reaches her goals through other methods than running, she should NOT diminish the goals, and should give herself the credit she is due for working so hard.

Clearly, "H" either misinterpreted my honesty, or frankly just wasn't ready(or interested?) in hearing it? And that is ok! It's too bad her feelings got hurt, but I don't think we should have to apologize for being honest when it comes from a really positive place.

Anyway, I am glad I found your blog through that situation. You are a great writer and I look forward to following your blog!

<3 K

Crissy said...

Healthy feedback for sure! I love it when I get ~out of the ordinary~ comments. Most people focus on complimenting items or the person. (You're amazing!) I do consider that normal. It's the best when a person actually takes the time to read what you blogged about and responds to that rather than just what's in the images.

Sometimes a person can help that their boobs aren't well contained. Most likely because they don't see it popping out like others and of course that will anger someone for whatever reason. It's their blog! No one forces anyone to comment haha

I've never experienced any hate mail. It wouldn't bother me if I received any either. I mean I'll just remove it. I wouldn't put together hate mail and being constructive together. There's just a right way to saying things! I just see it as someone hiding behind a computer to have the balls to say it.

The Epic Adventurer said...

Thank you for this! I actually found this post because I googled the phrase "aggressive blog comments" after getting really attacked on a website I usually love - because I disagreed. I was polite, but just fundamentally disagreed with the premise of the article. I thought blogging and commenting were to enable conversation, not create echo chambers? I just wish everyone kept their good old fashioned manners on them!


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